Blogging is tough.
It’s tough all throughout the year, of course, but it especially gets harder during the school year, when children begin to whistle with anxiety about all the tests and quizzes and homework and projects and studying they are soon to have. And then there are the annoying ones, the overachievers, with 19 billion AP classes and straight A’s and volunteer work and wonderful little blogverses and the extraordinary ability to stay awake upwards of twenty hours.
Alas, my friends: I am a child. More so than this, I am that child, the one drowning in homework… and oddly enjoying it. I’m also the kid that misses blogging, the teenager who prefers books over football games and dances, the nerd everyone else tries to mooch off of (in some classes, at least), the one who wants to get a Ph.D. or something else that will keep her in school till she’s thirty-five, the one who reads upwards of five books each and every week.
Sadly, I am not all of these people at once. I try very hard to be all of these people at once: resourceful and stellar and bloggily popular and nerdy and Ph.D.-candidate-y. I slowly flurrip along, writing blog posts and reading snippets of pages that I then realize I should probably perform the Miracle of Rhetorical Analysis on. I slowly flolop along, opting to be in more AP classes than I probably should be in, because I am Bored otherwise, Bored with a capital “B.” And then I’m also the kid that, quite frankly, does nothing (e)special(ly defining) at all.
At least that’s how some people see me, though it’s not really how I have learned to see myself.
“Ah, I see, you’re doing all these AP classes because you want to go to an Ivy League! Well, you know you can relax a bit, right?”
“You don’t need all those classes to go to college, do something FUN.”
Is it perhaps because my parents are Indian (and that’s the ethnicity/race I always have to check on the school forms)? Or because I just seem like the type of person whose only pretext for learning is to get into an Ivy League? (Or it could be friendly concern, but, you know, my mind refuses to acknowledge that prospect.)
Well, my fine-feathered friends, I have news for you: I’m not doing this because I want to go to an Ivy League. Well, I mean, OF COURSE I want to go to an Ivy League. That’s every nerd kid’s dream, right? To be among other nerds? TO BE AMONG OUR BRETHREN? But I’m digressing way too much here. My point is, I’m not doing this because I want to go to an Ivy League.
(Ivy Leagues are great colleges, guys. Definitely apply. I mean, who knows. You might get in. And then you might not get in, of course, and then you just wasted ninety bucks. But, then again, you’re probably brilliant and on your way to Harvard. Or Oxford. I hear England’s quite nice.)
AHEM. My point IS that when I suffer through my bajillion APs and honors courses and volunteering and reading and blogging and maybe-sometimes-hopefully-squeezing-in-some-writing this year, I’m really not thinking about Ivy Leagues, or doing classes just for college credit. I mean, I actually haven’t done anything in my high school career that was just to get into a college. Why would I? What’s the POINT? (Well, except maybe SAT’s and ACT’s. You can’t go to college without SAT’s and then there’s no other purpose for them, so why would I be doing them if it weren’t for colleges?)
I’m doing these classes, this terrifyingly difficult schedule, for me. Because I value myself and I value my brain, and I think challenging myself might be worth it, in exchange for some sleepless nights and a few fewer blog posts. And the point is not to get into college. High school is not just another place you go just to get to college. It’s not a bridge or a rope. It’s a path. A really long part of a nice path that will eventually come to a fork, a fork with many paths, and some of which will lead to college.
Dearest friends, if you think I enjoy blogging and writing and reading more than I do history or even calculus, then you are wrong. Because I enjoy learning, challenges (ASYNDETON! my brain just yelled out).
And if that makes blogging hard, so be it. If that makes people think that I am just trying to get into college, I will correct them. I am a human being. I have my own interests. I like to blog just as much as I like to learn. And I won’t apologize for that, or play it off as someone trying to get an Ivy League education. No. That’s not me. And why shouldn’t I challenge myself? It’s the challenge, perhaps, that makes it enjoyable.
(Oh, and that encouraging advice you’ve been told all your life? I’ve figured out how to write it in math form!)